The Never Knows Shop Fat Cats say: Buy Stuff!
NKhmc Home Harmony Boom Books Novelties Prints Editioned/Digital Posters Paintings Originals Comics

This, apparently, is where we sell the things we make.
All items for sale here were designed, drawn, written, crafted, produced, or forged by the Never Knows staff, most often by one of several P. Calavara's we keep on retainer, locked in the basement.
Please bear in mind we're not a fancy shop- we're an artist(s) with piles of stuff we made that we put up for sale here to keep our mother contented. We do our best to ship things and communicate promptly, but please be patient. Shipping is included in the cost of all items.
There you go.
Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics

Harmony Boom Island is a joint collaboration between P. Calavara (Never Knows HMC) and Christine Malek (Vidaliah Crafts).
We have created several books of a wide variety (from rhyming kids books to novels), an ongoing comic strip (updated every m/w/f), and a whole world of stuffed animals. To view all of our posters and stuffed creatures and paper dolls and coloring books, you should visit Gallery Boom, our art gallery in Tumwater, WA.
All we've got for sale here are (some of) the books, which are all published by Never Knows Books.
Jon the Mormo Met a Cow

Jon the Mormo Met a Cow by P. calavara
A delightful little rhyming book about the farm. Perfect for the very young.

$13.00 - Jon the Mormo Met a Cow!
(includes shipping!)
The Hubris of Hue

The Hubris of Hue by P. calavara
A rhyming book about colors, featuring creatues from the world of Harmony Boom.

$13.00 - The Hubris of Hue!
(includes shipping!)
Up In The Clouds

Up In The Clouds by P. calavara
Raquel and Molly find shapes in the clouds, plus some other stuff.
A picture book for the kiddie set.

$13.00 - Up In The Clouds
(includes shipping!)
Crazy Dangerous

Crazy Dangerous by P. calavara
The first collection of the Harmony Boom Island webcomic.

$18.00 - Crazy Dangerous!
(includes shipping!)
The Adventure of the Mysterious Adventure

The Adventure of the Mysterious Adventure by P. calavara
The first Harmony Boom novel. Suitable for all ages, published in delicious hardcover, lushly illustrated.

$25.00 - The Adventure of the Mysterious Adventure!
(includes shipping!)
Day of the Fuzzlebugs

Day of the Fuzzlebugs by P. calavara
The second Harmony Boom novel. Suitable for all ages, published in delicious hardcover, lushly illustrated.

$25.00 - Day of the Fuzzlebugs!
(includes shipping!)
The Umptuous Boomtionary

The Umptuous Boomtionary by P. calavara
An Utterly Themeless Harmony Boom Abecedary of Some Random Words in Some Sort of Order.

$13.00 - The Umptuous Boomtionary!
(includes shipping!)
Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
These are some of the many books created and released by Never Knows Books. Even if indicated otherwise, they're probably all by P. Calavara.
The Sneaky Snarky Osters

The Sneaky Snarky Osters by P. calavara
A collection of 26 poems about various creatures. Suitable for children and clever monkeys.

$12.00 - The Sneaky Snarky Osters.
(includes shipping!)


Animals Brew Coffee

Animals Brew Coffee by P. calavara
An alphabet books about animals and their favorite coffee-based drinks. The animals are not alphabatized, but the coffee is.

$10.00 - Animals Brew Coffee.
(includes shipping!)


All Bad Choices

All Bad Choices by P. calavara
A picture book about depression.

$11.00 - All Bad Choices
(includes shipping!)
Oh, Radio

Oh, Radio by P. calavara
Sex,
aliens,
betrayal,
& the end of the world,
all in this illustrated short story.

$10.00 - Oh, Radio!
(includes shipping!)
Slugger

Slugger by P. calavara
An Alphabet book about a giant lizard. Full color, deliciously amusing, a must own.

$11.00 - Slugger Alphabet Book.
(includes shipping!)


The Mechaniconscious Portmanteau

The Mechaniconscious Portmanteau by P. calavara
P. Calavara's hand-printed, hand-bound work of literary art is available now. Limited to 50 copies. This book was created with handset type, hand printed illustrations, and was bound by hand, representing hundreds of hours of work. Sheesh!

You can either buy a standalone copy of the book or buy a copy of the book with an extra piece of framable art. During the creation of the book, there were a number of extra illustrations and test prints made, which we are making available to people who purchase the book. The print will be chosen at random unless otherwise specified. More Info Here.

$27.00
TMP.

(includes shipping!)

$15.00
TMP Extra Art.

(only available with purchase of book)

The Sunny Disposition

The Sunny Disposition by P. calavara
This is a book about a true story that happened to some people we know. It was written, drawn, and designed in the space of a single day.

$9.00 - The Sunny Disposition.
(includes shipping!)


Door

Door by P. calavara
A short jaunt through some science.

$10.00 - Door.
(includes shipping!)
The Collected Scrimshaw

The Whole Kit 'n Caboodle

Scrimshaw - But Horrors! The Robot Whistled, Too! by P. calavara
B/W, 180+ pages.

The complete Scrimshaw all wrapped up in one nice little package with all sorts of cool bonus material. Available by itself or in a couple of packages with additional Scrimshaw related material. Includes the entire run of the comic, the origin of the strip, a movie script, new comics created just for this edition and also some other random junk we found laying around.

$16.00
Scrimshaw Book.

(includes shipping!)
The Trenchant Puppy

The Trenchant Puppy by P. calavara
An abecediary intended to impart good moral advice to those lost souls lucky enough to come across it. Or else an excuse to draw animals, we can't remember.

$13.00 - The Trenchant Puppy.
(includes shipping!)
9 Ways to Sock a Fish

9 Ways to Sock a Fish by P. calavara
Exactly what it claims to be. This book is printed and put together here in our offices (for now, perhaps forever) and slots in at 4"x3.6666~". You figure that one out, smart guy. Printed on cardstock.

$3.00 - 9 Ways to Sock a Fish.
(includes shipping!)
the TWIG

the TWIG by P. calavara
Our only non-Harmony Boom book that's meant for kids? Possibly. I'd have to check. A full color memoir/cumulative tale, guaranteed to be absolutely a book that we made!

$12.00 - the TWIG.
(includes shipping!)


The Wedding Bells

The Wedding Bells by P. Calavara
A tragedy in alphabet. 8"x10"

$12.00 - The Wedding Bells.
(includes shipping!)


The Smallest Possible Murder

The Smallest Possible Murder by Polly Calavara
A book I wrote and illustrated entirely in public over the course of a two day art festival in Olympia- all based on a public survey people took in the month leading up to the event.

$12.00 - The Smallest Possible Murder.
(includes shipping!)


Animal Parade

Animal Parade by the Calavara Twins
In 2013 we did a big series of interactive pieces of artwork. Some of those components were pulled together to create this book. The interactive box we built for this is available in Novelties. There are some Rubik's cubes floating around somewhere as well.

$13.00 - Animal Parade Book.
(includes shipping!)


Monsters

Monsters by P. Calavara
This is a long poem paired with some strange artwork on wood. No other real explanation. There are about 30 original pieces of artwork from it still available. It pretty much all looks like the cover. Like we said, weird project.

$12.00 - Monsters Book.
(includes shipping!)

$35.00 - Monsters Book and random piece of original art.
(includes shipping!)


Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
Animal Parade Box!

Animal Parade Box by P. Calavara
A limited edition interactive art set. Signed and editioned. Includes a couple of the original pieces of artwork used in its own creation. Also note the sweet book created from this project.

$27 - Animal Parade Box.
(includes shipping!)
Animal Parade Rubik's Cube!

Animal Parade Rubik's Cube by P. Calavara
A Rubik's Cube created for the interactive Animal Parade art exhibit. There are only a couple of these left laying around.

$16 - Animal Parade Rubik's Cube.
(includes shipping!)
Thurston County History Cards!

Thurston County History Cards by P. Calavara
A couple of years ago we did two volumes of history cards featuring people from the history of Thurston County. Click Here to learn a little more. They're sort of like baseball cards, only with stylized drawings, local history, and hilarious jokes.

$17.50 - Thurston County History Cards (both sets).
(includes shipping!)
It's the coffee mug!

Olympia by coffee mug
A local favorite up here in Thurston County.

$14 - Coffee Mug.
(includes shipping!)
It's a coffee mug!

Busy as a Badger by coffee mug
You know what you need? More coffee mugs. Don't feel bad. we ALL need more coffee mugs.

$14 - Coffee Mug.
(includes shipping!)
It's stickers!

Stickers!
Act now to order, like, SIX awesome Bathos/Calavara stickers for only $5. Pimp your ride, your laptop or bring them to the tattoo shop, shouting, "This one on my left cheek! And for gawd's sake hurry man!"

$5 - stickers.
(includes shipping!)
Everyone's favorite Panda Bunny

Panda Bunny T-Shirt

Not sure about availability. Please email and ask before you order.

$21 - T-shirt.
(includes shipping!)
We're also known for our raccoons.

Olympia ~ It's the Coffee T-Shirt
Available in Adult S,M,L,XL

Not sure about availability. Please email and ask before you order.

$20 - T-shirt.
(includes shipping!)
Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Editioned/Digital
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
We produce two types of prints: Editioned and Digital. Editioned prints are typically serigraphs, reliefs, and such as that. Digital Prints are created using a number of methods, including conventional printing, digital photograph printing, and printing-at-print-shop printing. I know, it's weird, but whatever.

These are editioned prints. While most of them are serigraphs, there may also be some relief prints, lithographs, or what have you, floating around in there. These are for the most part printed on rag paper, though some are on other types of paper, depending upon what was at hand. The lowest quality here is cardstock, which is still pretty good. Editioned prints will only ever exist in a limited quantity since, once printed, the means to make them are destroyed. Some of the original artwork that these were based upon is still available, so if you're interested let us know. Please note that because of both the nature of fine art printmaking, and our personal philosophy on the subject, there will always be minor variations between each print in the edition- to get a sense of this in action, check out our huge print project from a couple of years ago.

Bathos.

~5x7" serigraph- $17
(includes shipping!)

ChinZilla

~4x5" serigraph- $17
(includes shipping!)


Scrimshaw. Book also available for sale.

~5x7" serigraph w/ letterpress- $17
(includes shipping!)


~5x5" serigraph- $17
(includes shipping!)

Raccoon

~4x5" serigraph- $17
(includes shipping!)


5x7" print- $17
(includes shipping!)


~11x15" serigraph- $45
(includes shipping!)

Bathos w/ Dead Robot tat

~11x16" serigraph- $45
(includes shipping!)


~11x14" serigraph- $45
(includes shipping!)

Swine Flu

~14x11" serigraph- $45
(includes shipping!)


~11x14" serigraph and letterpress- $35
(includes shipping!)

Swine Flu

~11x17" serigraph- $50
(includes shipping!)


~17x21" serigraph- $65
(includes shipping!)

Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Editioned/Digital
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
These are digital prints, created using a variety of printing methods. We keep a quantity onhand and then get more printed as necessary. If you are interested in the original art for any of these pieces, let us know, since much of it is available, stashed in a portfolio in a wardrobe in the corner of our studio.

5x7" print- $8
(includes shipping!)


5x7" print- $8
(includes shipping!)


5x7" print- $8
(includes shipping!)


5x7" print- $8
(includes shipping!)


5x7" print- $8
(includes shipping!)


5x7" print- $8
(includes shipping!)


5x7" print- $8
(includes shipping!)

Some Robotic Pigs I Have Known

8"x10" print - $12
(includes shipping!)

Space Crime Cop Patrol

8"x10" print - $12
(includes shipping!)


8x10" print- $12
(includes shipping!)

Space Crime Cop Patrol - Partnered with a Robot Pig

8"x10" print - $12
(includes shipping!)

Space Crime Cop Patrol - Saving Santa

8"x10" print - $12
(includes shipping!)

Devil Goat, I guess...

8"x10" print - $12
(includes shipping!)

The Whale One, I guess...

8"x10" print - $12
(includes shipping!)

Every image from our book, Oh, Radio.

Please note that this print is a compilation of EVERY image from our book, Oh, Radio!

8"x10" print - $12
(includes shipping!)


4"x6" print - $7
(includes shipping!)


4"x6" print - $7
(includes shipping!)


4"x6" print - $7
(includes shipping!)

Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
Things That Scared Me, 1984-1997

Things That Scared Me, 1984-1997 11"x17"
Enjoy this poster, documenting some of my phobias both general and specific.
Click image to enlarge.

$15 - Things That Scared Me poster.
(includes shipping!)
Panda Bunny

Panda Bunny, Potsdamer Platz 11"x17"
Everyone's favorite identity-confused panda, moping about in front of Berlin's premier building for Pandas, Bunnies, and assorted marsupials (not pictured).

$15 - Panda Bunny poster.
(includes shipping!)
P. Calavara's HAMLET

P. Calavara's HAMLET 11"x17"
Depending upon your point of view, we have either radicalized the debate upon the influence this, the most important work in Western literature, has had upon the modern world of literature, or else we've provided a handy cheat sheet for those who just can't make the slodge through the Cliff notes.

Read the complete P. Calavara's HAMLET, plus the assorted spin-offs, here: hamlet.neverknows.com.

$15 - HAMLET poster.
(includes shipping!)
The Seduction of Adam Smith

The Seduction of Adam Smith 12"x18"
Surely you know someone who cares too much about money.

$15 - Adam Smith poster.
(includes shipping!)
Some Robotic Demons from Around Town

Some Robotic Demons from Around Town 12"x18"
I don't really have any explanation that will make this okay...

$15 - Robotic Demons poster.
(includes shipping!)
What Superpower is Best?

What Superpower is Best? 11"x17"
This poster is actually pretty self explanatory.

$15 - Superpower poster.
(includes shipping!)
Adjudicate, Bombast, Caliphate...

Adjudicate, Bombast, Caliphate... 11"x17"
This alphabet poster is just that.

$15 - Adjudicate, Bombast poster.
(includes shipping!)
Don't Argue With Badgers.

Don't Argue With Badgers 12.25"x17.25"
Another Alphabet poster from the Land of nod.

$15 - Don't Argue poster.
(includes shipping!)
Boys Club

The Boys Club Association of Villainy 11"x17"
Every evil society starts somewhere. Here are the charter members of this particular organization.

$15 - Boys Club poster.
(includes shipping!)
Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
We have several paintings, and will try to add some of them soon. Thank you for your patience.

In the meantime, cruise by Calavara.com to check some of them out and to see new ones as they're finished.

Top
Harmony Boom
Books
Novelties
Prints
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
The artwork contained here consists of illustrations, usually done with India ink and then colored with an ink wash. They are all on bristol unless otherwise noted. These are original works of art, not prints.
Gravity

Gravity 14"x17"
This piece was inspired, in part, by Goya's Saturn Eating His Son. You can make of that whatever you like. Raining robots is not an uncommon theme for me.

This piece is also available as an 8x10 digital print.

$100 - Gravity
14"x17" original artwork

(includes shipping!)
$12 - Gravity
8"x10" digital print

(includes shipping!)

Soundwaves.

Soundwaves ~3"x~7" paper on wood
These are ten drawings, mounted on bits of wood I cut up for that purpose. The mounting holes were drilled into the wood, approx where the middle ought to be. The vagueness was not an accident- just call it artistic freedom.

You can either order one and take your chance or you can request one specifically using whatever means you can to describe it.

$30 - Soundwave art.
(includes shipping!)
Unit2505 Unit2505-2 Unit2505-2

Unit2505 14"x17"
So the deal here is that three moderately identical drawings were produced of my frequently reoccurring lady robot. They were done using a light table from an initial drawing (that was subsequently destroyed) in order to get the basic structure identical, but were finished loosely to allow for natural drift. I also used a very open pen nib to allow for unexpected puddling, drips, and variations. Finally, they were colored using ink wash

$75 - Unit2505-1.
(includes shipping!)

$75 - Unit2505-2.
(includes shipping!)

$75 - Unit2505-3.
(includes shipping!)

$200 - Unit2505-1,2, and 3.
(includes shipping!)
Top
Books
Novelties
Prints
Posters
Paintings
Originals
Comics
Lusus Naturae issue 1

Lusus Naturae issue 1
Issue 1 of P. Calavara's comic about the A+ Monster Abatement Company.

$4.50 - Lusus #1.
(includes shipping!)
Lusus Naturae issue 2

Lusus Naturae issue 2
Issue 2 of P. Calavara's comic about the A+ Monster Abatement Company.

$4.00 - Lusus #2.
(includes shipping!)
The Collected Scrimshaw

The Whole Kit 'n Caboodle

Scrimshaw - But Horrors! The Robot Whistled, Too! by P. calavara
B/W, 180+ pages.

The complete Scrimshaw all wrapped up in one nice little package with all sorts of cool bonus material. Available by itself or in a couple of packages with additional Scrimshaw related material. Includes the entire run of the comic, the origin of the strip, a movie script, new comics created just for this edition and also some other random junk we found laying around.

Besides the collected book, we also have a handbound and editioned color version of the story that inspired it all. Though this story is included, in b/w, within the collected edition, completists will want to add this to their collection while it's still available.

Finally, we have an editioned serigraph of the Whale, with a letterpress title.

$16.00
Scrimshaw Book.

(includes shipping!)

$17.00
Scrimshaw Print

(includes shipping)

$11.00
Treatise book.

(includes shipping)

$40.00
All Three!

(includes shipping)


all bathos, pathos, images, words, ennui, stories, et al copyright 2011 Never Knows Heavy Manufacturing Concern, P. Calavara & Rick Perry.